Bad Teacher

PITCH

VIEWING

           Not only was it mind-numbing and predictable but I only remember chuckling 3 times [maybe 4].  Those instances were spread evenly throughout the entirety of this flick.  One at the beginning, one dab smack in the middle and one at the very end.  Mind you I said chuckle and not laugh... although there's this one scene with Justin Timberlake doing his part to promote safe sex that had me actually laugh but that was it.  

         Thank goodness for Jason Segel. He helped make the movie... watchable. His rant with the little black kid about Micheal vs. LeBron was a disappointment though.  I thought there would be more to it but it wasn't.  Had they not showed that part in ALL the trailers I could of seen myself laughing at it giving my laugh total a whopping 4 [maybe 5]!!! 

          Where this movie fails at is there is no sympathy for Elizabeth [Cameron Diaz], so ultimately we are waiting for her demise, practically hoping for it.  Unlike say... Bad Santa, where the jokes ARE actually funny and you feel for Billy Bob Thornton.  You can relate to his situations and conflicts where with Elizabeth, you have to be a heartless, scandalous, self-absorbing shallow prick to find ANY of her situational humor either funny or interesting.  During her character arcing, predictably she tries to change and it's just nerve wrecking.

This movie isn't worth your time and less than that... your money.  C-

Not a total failure because of some help by Timberlake and  Segel... but if I was you, I'd wait till school is out and hit the DVD.

WORTH

$

The Green Lantern

"The one thing a Green Lantern is supposed to be is fearless. That isn't me."

PITCH

VIEWING

"There's no such thing as magic..."

           Just a reminder... I will be evaluating the movie as it pertains to: "is it worth your money?"  Not the super hero or the origins of the super hero or if the movie is accurate because truthfully... I'm not an experienced reader of the Green Lantern comics.  My guest writer is and hopefully he can weigh in on this.

          From ALL the trailers that I've viewed before the movie released, I was concerned that all the CGI in the movie would be cheap, overbearing, and relied upon to propel the movie... I was wrong.  All the computer effects and digital imagery were well done, George Lucas level type stuff... impressive.

            There were a lot of very interesting points in the story.  Namely, an incredible lesson about all of the most powerful "energies" in the universe and their strengths and weaknesses.  Hal Jordan's family's history and a fantastic revelation about the purpose of the green energy.

                Ryan Reynolds was a great cast, so I'm told. He embodied the character of Hal Jordan perfectly. Unfortunately, most of my gripes came from the acting or maybe just the acting scheme. There are times where he is propelled intergalactically thru outer realms to another planet [with his eyes-open] and when he gets there he's cracking jokes and... just way too calm for what just happened in my opinion.  There's a scene with his nephew that I thought should have been felt a little more by me.  Lastly, the arch of his character (Hal) wasn't as convincing as I would of liked it to be [emotionally].

          The rest of the questions I had were answered by those that read the comic. Origin or foundation type movies all have an incredible responsibility .  They have to inform as well as entertain us.  The only kinds of  introductory movies that may have an easier time doing both are prequels... X-Men: First Class is a great example of that.  Prequels are able to cheat because the Who, What, When and Why are usually out of the way. With all that being said the director [Martin Campbell] of the Green Lantern had a heck of a time informing  and catching us all up to date within a reasonable time.  The Green Lantern is a very complex character/world. 

             I think the movie did a good job of combining everything we needed to see in under  a hour and a half.

I feel like the movie was definitely worth the money and it earns a B- from me.

WORTH
$$$

 

Super 8

PITCH

VIEWING

          Super 8 is worth a lot more than the mediocre hype that it received.  Shards of light that accompanied action sequences on screen along with exaggerated but beautiful explosions screamed J.J Abrams. While the retro, warm-natured characters that you can connect with and relate to along with childhood innocent side stories screams Spielberg.

                       They did an incredible job of keeping whatever was terrorizing that small town under wraps until the very end; and even more satisfying is... that wasn't the most interesting story in the film!

            Every character in this movie was very interesting even just by themselves.

 


Not too much more I can say about this film with out giving it away so...

           Without further delay I grade this movie a very strong A.
If your theater offers the D-BOX seat experiece
go for it! 

DON'T FORGET TO WAIT TILL THE CREDITS

BONUS MATERIAL

WORTH

$$$$$

{ Just for fun }

The Tree of Life

PITCH

VIEWING

Frustrating.

          My intent was just to leave this review at that one word, that one very descriptive adjective provided by my good friend Brandon, but I feel like I owe you more.

         By now you've heard from both sides. You have one side that feels that those people whom didn't like this creme' le' film were too shallow to appreciate it. Then you have my side that feels that if you like this... feature, then your reaching [and will be ultimately miserable in this high octane summer cinema bash that we are having this year at the movies].

Wherever your at, I respect both sides.  This review is written very late in the week and I've had some time to simmer down.  Had this been any earlier, Oh! I would of made a fuss.  All the potential in the world to be one of the greatest films EVER!!! Instead we got, as another friend [Paul Moore] put it " a slideshow of National Geographic" and a cute little story sprinkled in here and there.

Although limited Sean Penn, delivered.

Brad Pitt just continues to get better with each film.

I went in wanting to like this but I didn't.  It gets a D from me and that's being extremely nice.

Oddly enough, it's worth the money.  I know, I know...

I guess I want you to experience it for yourself and come to your own conclusions.

It's not like the film was a poor effort but a poor effort of execution.

WORTH

$$

X-MEN: FIRST CLASS

PITCH

Official Trailer

"I've been at the mercy of men just following orders. Never again"

VIEWING

           Rolling right along into the summer of all cinema summers, we hit one of the most anticipated milestones: X-MEN: FIRST CLASS... and might I remind all of the honest people out there of just how worried we all were once we saw the mock-ups and the casting for this prequel expedition... Little did we know, very little did we know.  Turns out this chapter of the X-MEN series is a jewel.

         The casting couldn't of been done any better and kudos to Michael Fassbender for landing the Magneto role! Truly one of the the great up-and-coming actors of our time.

           The retro look actually worked.  Everything looked authentic 70's style without seeming outdated.  

Actually, the movie made a lot of things look sweet!!  My most favorite plane of all time is the SR-71A Blackbird... they tricked that out into a VTOL and it was still authentic because that technology was available at the time.

The Cuban missile crisis was the back drop to the main story, how many pictures can you say successfully achieved a story line that out shined one of the most scariest times of our American history?  

The movie was pretty exhilarating, while somehow maintaining a good medium tempo to keep you focused on all the ambient issues going on.  Besides a few gripes at the beginning, the rest of the movie was dang near flawless

                  The new mutants were interesting and all had unique personalities that made it easier to connect and truly care what became of them.  A great cameo and some very strong villains made for a wild time at the show!

Michael Fassbender as Magneto

           I'll  reiterate that one of my favorites types of stories are the ones that involve best friends/brothers becoming enemies i.e BEN-HUR, Obi Wan Kenobi and Darth V in StarWars, Boyz n the Hood, ect.  You have to pick one side but it's tragic because you understand both points of view.  Love it! A grade!

WORTH

$$$$$

KUNG FU PANDA 2

track 3: Inner Peace ---->
Here is some
music from the incredible Hans Zimmer motion picture soundtrack to read too...

Kung Fu Panda 2
John Powell Hans Zimmer | Format: MP3 Download (May 24, 2011)
5.0 out of 5 stars   (1)

Listen to samples

Buy the MP3 Album: $7.99

PITCH

"Ummm... That was my fist"

VIEWING

                       THIS IS HOW YOU MAKE A SEQUEL!!! New story and true to it's roots. A lot of new adventures and revelations along with the introduction of a new foe that presents an entirely new dilemma.

Look at this list of voice talent, just look at it!

	Jack Black	...	Po (voice)
	Angelina Jolie	...	Tigress (voice)
	Dustin Hoffman	...	Shifu (voice)
	Gary Oldman	...	Shen (voice)
	Jackie Chan	...	Monkey (voice)
	Seth Rogen	...	Mantis (voice)
	Lucy Liu	...	Viper (voice)
	David Cross	...	Crane (voice)
	James Hong	...	Mr. Ping (voice)
	Michelle Yeoh	...	Soothsayer (voice)
	Danny McBride	...	Wolf Boss (voice)
	Dennis Haysbert	...	Master Ox (voice)
	Jean-Claude Van Damme	...	Master Croc (voice)
	Victor Garber	...	Master Rhino (voice)

How can you go wrong with that ensemble of talent? One thing that I enjoyed about this KFP franchise is the depth of Asian culture that surrounds each story. Not only that but the wisdom of it's characters and how it relates to the real world.... [Drifting on a memory about Master Oogway's lesson about the illusion of control from the original KFP]:

Oogway: My friend, the panda will never fulfill his destiny, nor you yours until you let go of the illusion of control.
Shifu: Illusion?
Oogway: Yes.
[points at peach tree]
Oogway: Look at this tree, Shifu: I cannot make it blossom when it suits me nor make it bear fruit before its time.
Shifu: But there are things we *can* control: I can control when the fruit will fall, I can control where to plant the seed: that is no illusion, Master!
Oogway: Ah, yes. But no matter what you do, that seed will grow to be a peach tree. You may wish for an apple or an orange, but you will get a peach.
Shifu: But a peach cannot defeat Tai Lung!
Oogway: Maybe it can, if you are willing to guide, to nurture it, to believe in it.
Shifu: But how? How? I need your help, master.
Oogway: No, you just need to believe. Promise me, Shifu, promise me you will believe.

If this wasn't animated it would get way more respect than has been shown. I was surprised at the amount of people who have NOT seen this movie but enjoyed the first one... what gives?

           The cinematography couldn't be any better maybe with the exception of Rango's beautiful scenery, depending on which kinds of scenery you prefer. 

         I have said this before but it is worth repeating... Animated movies are THEE best format to make 3D movies in. ESPECIALLY with this HI-DEF technology being pushed to the last pixel.  You will find no better use of those recyclable 3-D glasses than for Kung Fu Panda 2!

           With that said, this movie earns an A-, definitely worth your time and money.

WORTH

$$$$